No Spend Challenge Journal: Week 3

This is Week 3 of our No Spend February Journey. To start at the beginning or jump ahead, click here for Week 1, Week 2 and the final Week 4.

Weekly Recap
This week was a lesson in how to deal with frugality in a celebratory situation. The compulsion to spend cash as a way to express love during the holidays and the guilt associated with each dollar spent, or not spent, really forced me to evaluate my relationship with love and money. 

Day 15: My husband received a packaged. He found a $50 Amazon gift card and spend $25 on Stratego, thinking that it would be a fun game we could play at home. I would have preferred for him to just bring out one of the many board games we already have and save the GC to spend on essentials but his heart was in the right place.

I put up net fencing around my garden with materials we already had from last season so that I could keep our corgi out of the grow area as she has a habit of digging and pulling up plants. I'm very motivated to grow a high yield garden this year that can really reduce our produce bill and increase our health. While working on the garden, I realized that we were not being very good stewards of our home and money before this challenge. It takes a lot of work to make a beautiful and productive home and instead of making our home a lovely place, we were out in the world spending money to escape from the responsibilities that come with a good life. 

Day 16: I woke up from a nightmare that I was recklessly spending money. I was out with friends, eating and shopping. In my dream, I knew I didn't want to spend the money, that I was supposed to be on ‪#‎nospendfebruary‬ challenge, but I couldn't stop myself. But actually, in the dream, I was spending money the way I did in January. When I woke up, I was so relieved the money wasn't gone! I think the challenge is really getting to me. My husband and I have been working on his resume so he can apply for his MBA and hopefully get a waiver on the GMAT/GRE requirements and we found out they approved the waiver! That's $250 saved!

I also called Disney guest services because we've avoided Disneyland due to the measles outbreak which means we lost a month of use from our annual pass. After talking to 4 different people, they extended expiration by a month. That's a $90 value (the cost of the passes prorated by month). I'm so happy about this because, this year, we're not renewing our passes since my husband will hopefully be enrolled in an MBA program by the time September rolls around and we won't have time to go as a family anymore. Instead, my goal will be to find free family friendly activities.

Day 17: This post will finally catch me up to current day! I have had an extremely emotionally charged day for the first time in ‪#‎nospendfebruary‬. Through most of this challenge, I have felt empowered and optimistic. Like I am gaining control of my finances and living a better life. Today, because I couldn't buy things I usually would, I felt poor and disappointed. That's so crazy to me because I know we have the money and could spend it and are choosing not to for bigger goals but I refused to spend on principal and felt like I was violating my personal values.

I think I need a little guidance here from No Spending Veterans. It's long winded (as I'm sure you know I am at this point) so thank you in advance to anyone willing to read through this personal dilemma. This Thursday is Chinese New Year. Imagine doing this challenge during Christmas and it's kind of like that. Before Chinese New Year, my mom and I head to Little Saigon and buy fruit, flowers, cakes, candy and ceremonial things for the Buddhist altar. We buy food for the big family party and enjoy the festival atmosphere since it's so packed and resembles the Vietnam my mom remembers from before coming to America. I usually try to pay for as much as she'll let me. My parents are very well off so she doesn't need me to pay for anything, I do it out of filial duty. Culturally, we believe that once our parents are done taking care of us, it's our turn to take care of them. Financially, I don't believe my parents will ever need me to take care of them in the future due to their substantial estate. So when we go out to eat or whatnot, I try and pick up the bill out of respect. My parents don't always let me but I know they are proud when I do it. I have actually been avoiding going out to dinner with my family during the challenge because I didn't want to not pick up the bill. My mom knows I'm doing the challenge and has said that she would pay but I just don't feel comfortable with that. Why should I enjoy the benefits of dining out from mooching off other people? So I have declined. I figured for Chinese New Year this year I would only modestly decorate my home. Use lanterns I already had. Put oranges from my CSA box on the altar. Buy small cakes instead of the big ones. Skip the fancy flowers I usually buy. You know, try a frugal holiday. And I would just not go to the market with my mom because I was busy with work anyway. Well, my mom needed me to go today and I ended up with the morning off from work so I went with her. I did have some pocket cash so I bought her her favorite iced coffee and a drink for myself while we were shopping ($4) and pitched in for flowers so she wouldn't have to break a large bill ($3). She tried to stop me (reminding me about the challenge) but I just felt like such a crappy person not paying for things I would normally buy for her. My mom wanted to have lunch and I couldn't say no since we were already out and she was hungry, so she paid for lunch too. I felt so restrained. So bad about myself. I just kind of felt like instead of focusing on saving money, I should put all my effort into becoming as wealthy as possible so I wouldn't have to worry about money. But I know fundamentally, that doesn't make sense. My parents came here with nothing and amassed a fortune by being smart, hardworking and frugal. I guess my take away here is that I should have budgeted better for Chinese New Year and put the money in the budget to spend on my parents since it's important to me.

 

Day 18: This was Chinese New Year's Eve and I helped my mom clean her house in preparation. I think I tried harder to help her with manual labor this year over past years because I wasn't able to spend money to help her in other ways for CNY. It's surprising the number of things I used to throw money at to fix. We went to a member appreciation dinner with my husband's Rod & Gun Club, which was basically a free lasagna dinner. Now, my husband and I used to dine out very often and would always have alcoholic beverages with our meal so my husband's first thought was "What are we going to do about wine?" He wanted to bring a bottle but then we'd have to pay corkage. He was literally stumped until I reminded him that we could just drink water with our dinner. He was disappointed but accepted it. It's funny the things we used to feel were just expected expenditures. ‪#‎nospendfebruary‬ lessons.

Day 19: Chinese New Year!! We're celebrating with extended family on Saturday but my husband took the day off work, I took a half day yesterday so we went with my son and mom to a Buddhist temple for New Year's festivities. We pulled out some loose cash we had laying around the house to donate to the temple and to buy somethings for my mom, which seemed like the right thing to do after my Day 17 realizations. Spent $29 guilt free and had a lovely time. We also spend the day eating only vegetarian food in honor of the holiday which is so inexpensive! I think we're going to start integrating Meatless Mondays into our weekly routine.

Day 20: We were supposed to go to Disneyland since we haven't been in a while and we're annual pass holders (it's almost a waste not to go) and they do a Disney Chinese New Year event in one of the lands. My husband decided he didn't want to go to Disneyland if we couldn't spend money and eat the food there. Literally, Disneyland is no fun to him without being able to have some drinks and eat some Disney food. I really love going to Disneyland and even have a blog post written about how to go to Disneyland without spending any money other than one's ticket (http://funsprungfamily.blogspot.com/…/save-money-at-disneyl…) and was really disappointed at my husband's attitude towards this. We stayed home instead. frown emoticon

Day 21: We celebrated Chinese New Year with my extended family. In previous years, we would have given away $500+ in red envelopes, carefully deciding how much each person should get based on where they were in their life. Less for younger kids, more for college kids, etc. I would always have a ballpark of how much we wanted to give and then end up surpassing that amount out of the need to give enough to show off our wealth. This year, I realized I don't care. If I have one big take away from ‪#‎nospendfebruary‬ it is this: My worth is not measured by the money I spend. We gave $20 to each kid and you know what? Everyone enjoyed the new year just as much as when we gave more than $20 to each kid.

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No Spend Challenge Journal: Week 2

This is Week 2 of our No Spend February Journey. Click here for a link to Week 1, Week 3 or the final Week 4.

Weekly Recap
This week felt like a lifestyle shift. We definitely started experiencing the benefits of a life not driven by dropping into the store which turns out is a life driven by non-consumer moments. Instead of feeling accomplished by buying things, we did things. Turns out, lots of skills and lots of good memories can be made without spending a dime!

 Day 8: ‪#‎nospendfebruary‬ is making me a better baker! Because we are running low on bread, I decided to make good use of all the flour in our house. Today I made biscuits and french baguettes from scratch! I also ran out of baking powder and learned that baking powder is only baking soda and cream of tartar so I made my own. I am never buying baking powder again. There are so many things in my pantry that can be decluttered if I stopped buying things that are just combinations of other things I already have. Got through a ton of laundry too. Staying home and baking on the weekend really makes the weekends seem much longer!

Day 9: This morning my mom asked me to find out about dental coverage on their insurance plan for my sister and make her an appointment because she needed a re-root canal done and the out of pocket cost without insurance was close to $1k. Just as I was in the process and found out the co-pay was $350, I asked my sister why she needed it done again. Turns out she had it done a year and a half ago and it's hurting her again. I called the original dentist who did the work a year and a half ago, told them it was bothering her again and they said to have her come in and they would treat it for free. Obviously, because they must have done something incorrectly but still, saving money for my parents!

Today is also the first day I felt stifled or deprived. I was driving by Costa Mesa for work, where many of my favorite stores are, and realized that I couldn't just pop in and buy something. Anything. Just because. The moment was fleeting but it made me feel like this challenge will be tougher as the month goes on. I get freebies from vendors and today I got brownie brittle and bacon jerky, which I snacked on, total junk I wouldn't have eaten if I weren't on the ‪#‎nospendfebruary‬ challenge but I ate it because I can't buy snacks. I'm having a dinner party for my SIL's birthday on Thursday and realized that I have a $25 gift certificate to Target, which I think I might use as the dinner party budget along with a few staples I already have at home. Butternut squash soup (have all ingredients), mixed green salad (have), Chicken Parmesan ($6 chicken, $10 cheese, have everything else) with spaghetti (have) and garlic bread. I was worried that I would have to spend money this week for groceries outside of our CSA delivery but I might actually get to the middle of the month without touching our cash!

Day 10: I did not make it to the middle of the month without spending cash. I spent $78 on food today, a small amount for the dinner party on Thursday, most for 2 weeks worth of food to supplement the pantry. I struggled with the idea of not buying food. Does anyone else do this? I suppose we could have continued to live off the pantry but we had actually run out of meat and whole grain bread, which are two healthy staples in our house that in my effort to not spend money, I ended up using white carb/highly processed substitutes which undermines our health goals. I don't know if I'm justified or just coming up with convincing excuses for spending. We did budget $200 for the month for food, knowing we would likely have to supplement, but I was hoping not to have to touch it.

Since we're a third of the way through, I checked in with my husband about how he felt about the challenge. He said that he didn't feel like he was sacrificing or missing out on anything. If anything, it feels like we have more time. I agree because it feels like we have a better quality of life now. More at peace, in control and the house is definitely cleaner. We briefly discussed doing this again, maybe once every few months, which was not the original plan for ‪#‎nospendfebruary‬. My husband is a prepper and from this challenge so far, I've learned that prepping for an effective no spend month is not that different from preparing for a catastrophic emergency. I'm making a list of everything I had to buy this month and figuring out a way to make/grow it myself for the next time we do a no spend month. 
 

Day 11:  I opened an Amazon seller's account so that I could list all the books I've been hoarding for sale. The app is so easy to use, all you do is scan the barcode, set the price, choose shipping options and list! I am looking forward to purging a lot of these books I have been allowing to collect dust. I'm only keeping books I love, books for my baby, and reference books that I know we'll use. How do you choose what books you purge? Our CSA delivery came yesterday so we're deep in fresh fruits and vegetables! I'm also working on my garden plan trying to figure out how to make my garden as perennial as possible. I found this great site (http://www.smartgardener.com) that does free comprehensive garden planning!

Day 12: I threw that dinner party for my sister's birthday yesterday. It took some pre-planning (making bread in advance, prepping vegetables instead of buying them pre-prepped), but I served Boursin toast points ($5), beet and blue cheese salad ($5), and chicken parmesan ($22), fresh baguettes with an olive oil balsamic garlic dipping sauce, and craft beer ($12), supplemented with things I already had at home, for 5 people plus one child (basically $7.33/pp). I used to spend $100 on average for a dinner party of this size. Or we would go out to eat and spend $150-$200.  It was $19 over my budget of $25 but I do have lot of food leftover. Like enough pasta for another meal, enough chicken for another dinner, enough cheese and sauce for a pizza, enough lettuce for a week's worth of salad, etc. And we had a lovely family meal. Honestly, I was worried that ‪#‎nospendfebruary‬ would really hurt our lifestyle but after a wonderful time last night, I genuinely feel the only things we've lost are the things that weren't important to begin with.
 
 Day 13: Ended up working late and then rushing around to get dinner on the table and get my walk in. We ended up taking a family walk, something my husband is not fond of but in the spirit of Valentine's day, he happily obliged. After all, it's not like we could have gone out and spent money like we normally would. The walk was more energizing and enjoyable anyway. We listened to the Dave Ramsey podcast, talked about our financial goals and future business plans. It was productive. When we got home, he gave me my Valentine's day presents, which he surprisingly prepurchased in January so it didn't violate ‪#‎nospendfebruary‬. It was two gifts; something I needed and then something frivolous. I might have previously just been thrilled that he got me frivolous jewelry, even if I didn't like it because of the sentiment. Now I just wished I had communicated better that I would be happier without the jewelry and the money still in the bank. Also, have you noticed the busier you are, working or being productive, the less time you have to think about spending money? Idle hands and all that.

 

Day 14: We're half way through the month! I'm beginning to see how much advertising really drives the "need" to spend. After watching a few episodes of different food based shows, I wanted to go out to eat. Just have a meal made of food I didn't already have in my house, like a Masala Dosa or Mediterranean Lamb. I was also getting a bit stir crazy being cooped up in the house! We didn't go anywhere but I did bake jalapeno bacon cheese corn muffins. One of the biggest challenges for me so far is falling into a routine. I'm not someone who enjoys routine because the moment it feels like a rut, I want to rebel and do something new and different. I realize that this is part of the reason my husband and I spend so much. In that sense, becoming parents have significantly helped us in the ‪#‎nospendfebruary‬ challenge because routine is GREAT for kids. Since starting the challenge, and really eating every meal at home instead of at a restaurant, taking daily walks to the park with my 17 month old son instead of taking him shopping, and spending more time at home instead of constantly out, he's really showing his understanding of the world. He'll walk over to the stroller and say "Walk," or when it's meal time or he's hungry, he'll climb into his highchair (which he hated previously) and he's happier about his bedtime routine. That is really motivating for me to keep with the routine that we've built to be successful at this challenge.

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No Spend Challenge Journal: Week 1

Sometime in January, my husband and I realized that we had never stopped spending from the frenzy that was Christmas shopping. We weren't big spenders before but we found ourselves getting boxes everyday of something we had bought online because it sounded like a good idea to buy. The Hosh actually bought a $40 notebook holder. Like for an actual notebook, not the computer kind. It was time to admit we had a problem so we decided to go on a spending cleanse to reset out spending habits.

The rules of this challenge include only spending on core expenses, like our mortgage, utilities, etc. and setting up a tiny budget for food and prior commitments. We sat down, drafted a budget detailing the absolutely necessary spending per month. The goal was to stay on budget and not spend any unplanned dollar outside the budget.

Here's the story of our #nospendfebruary.

Click here to jump ahead to Week 2, Week 3 or the final Week 4.

Weekly Recap
The first week was really eye opening. I found that we had more time for family centric activities, developed a deeper sense of gratitude for the things we already had, learned more homesteading skills like making household cleaners and being more mindful of every penny.  We also realized how easy it was to spend money without a thought.

Day 1: I ran out of dish washing detergent and previously I would have run to the store and bought some, and probably a couple of other things in addition because I "needed" them but instead I used all natural materials from around my house and made my own dish washing detergent. My husband thought it cleaned even better than the store bought detergents! Score! My husband entered into the Superbowl Pool (forgetting that it was ‪#‎nospendfebruary‬) at the party we were at. Luckily, I won the first quarter and final so we ended up +$40 after the initial bet.

Superbowl Party Food. Yum.

 Day 2: Packed lunch, crockpot pork roast for dinner, found ourselves with a lot of extra free time since we didn't go out to dinner (the month before we went out to dinner over 75% of the time!) Spent the extra time cleaning and playing with my baby!

Day 3: Spent money at dinner but that was pre-planned before we decided on doing No Spend February. It will be our only meal out during this month. I also went to Walmart with my mom for 1.5 hours and almost bought a few things but each time, I reasoned I didn't need that item. By the end of the trip, this really positive reassuring feeling came over me. It was like being content, feeling like we have enough, and grateful that we have more than we need. 

 Day 4: Found out that our corgi has fleas, likely because in addition to No Spend February, I have started a walking challenge so I've been walking our dog around the neighborhood a lot more and she keeps stopping in the yard of this house that is overrun with outdoor cats, most of which I assume have fleas. My husband wants to take her to the groomer for a flea dip but I looked up an all natural DIY flea dip that I'll be trying to make at home tonight. Also, we're doing leftovers for dinner tonight so that we don't waste any food. I feel like we're making really good progress and actually starting to use the things in our house that have been collecting dust. Maybe a household purge is also in order.

Day 5: I was in Little Saigon today for something work related and usually when I'm down there, I'll pick up some different dishes at the little restaurants/markets because they're inexpensive and delicious. My husband took a day off of work today and usually, if he does that, I try to stop in and bring him lunch. This morning, I literally said, "Oh, since you're home today, I'll just stop by that Vietnamese sandwich place you like and... and get you nothing. Because I can't spend any money. I'll come home and eat leftovers for lunch with you instead." He laughed and said, "Harder than you thought, huh?" I also was running late this morning so I didn't get a chance to make my morning fruit/veggie smoothie or have breakfast so by the time lunchtime rolled around and I was driving home, EVERYTHING was calling out to me. I actually avoided driving on side streets and stayed on the highway as much as I could so that I wouldn't be enticed by driving some new restaurant. I did end up making it home without buying anything but now I need to figure out how to make my own french baguettes at home. This is a huge departure from our normal habits. We would dine out almost everyday for lunch or dinner or both. I wouldn't even think in advance about meals because I assumed I could just stop in and buy whatever I had an urge for. 

Day 6: Paid our mortgage today. I used to just make sure I paid it before the 15th because it wouldn't be considered late but they would tack on a $6 convenience fee. I always reasoned, $6 is like a cup of coffee, no worries. But with the ‪#‎nospendfebruary‬ challenge, Bank of America is no longer getting free money from me! Last night, I also found out that we're paying a ridiculous amount on internet service. I spent this morning reducing our rate plan by $10 a month. That's a savings of $120 a year! I wonder what else I'm mindlessly paying too much for on autopay. 

This OSH is amazing and we still didn't buy anything. #willpower

Day 7: Scheduled my breast pump rental to be picked up. My son has stopped taking a bottle during the day so I don't need to pump anymore! $44/month saved. We also took care of all our recycling and took the $45 we made straight to the bank. While out taking care of errands, I got really hungry but didn't breakdown and buy food. We ended up just cutting the day short and going home to eat. I need to remember to pack more snacks for when hunger strikes. I can see this being a problem in the future when we aren't was close to home. We walked around Orchard Hardware while waiting for an appointment and successfully avoided buying anything but I am reminded that I need to start some seeds for the upcoming grow season. Normally I would have gone to the store and bought hundreds worth of gardening goodies but this year I am going to try using what I have and see what I can score for free. ‪#‎nospendfebruary‬

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